Intimate Apparel
by Aspirin
Summary: Ron and Harry snoop through Hermione's room and find . . .a thong?


Intimate Apparel  
  
(Author's note: this fic takes place when Harry, Ron and Hermione are about the age of 19 or 20!)   
  
As Harry, Ron and Hermione were walking down the hall of their dorm for the newly made College for Witches and Warlocks, they began to talk about their plans for the up-coming weekend.  
  
"I thought that maybe we could all go to the Quidditch game on Saturday. Neville will be there too, I think. You know, Oliver Wood made the cut for the Chudley Cannons." Said Harry.   
  
"Well, sure, I guess that we could all go. I heard that Cho Chang might be there too." Said Ron. Harry's face flushed with pleasure and embarrassment. Cho Chang. The apple of his eye, the goddess of his world. Harry liked everything about her; from the way her hair fell, to the sparkle of her eyes when she smiled. He even liked the cute little wand twirl she did when she made a pineapple out of a rock... "Harry!" said Ron and Hermione in unison.   
  
"Yeah?" he asked, snapping out of his daydream with remorse. You've been standing there with a silly look on your face for the past three minutes!" said Hermione.   
  
"I was?"   
  
"Yes, you were." Said Ron.  
  
"Oh. Well, how about it? Do you want to come to the game?" Asked Harry.  
  
"Sure!" Said Ron, happy to be invited.  
  
"How about you, Hermione?" both the boys asked.  
  
"Well...erm, I'm uh...busy! I can't go. Not Saturday. Nope. Busy all weekend. Can't do a thing. Hey, I have to go talk to Lavender. There she is, bye!" Said Hermione.   
  
"A simple no would have sufficed." Said Ron.   
  
"No kidding." said Harry, " I've seen her act like this all week. She won't agree to go out or anything. One time I was at the mall and caught her coming out of a women's clothing store, if you know what I mean."   
  
"Same here." Agreed Ron, "I overheard her say that she's going to be out with a study group tonight. What do you say we go look in her room to see what's going on?" Said Ron, waggling his eyebrows at the daring suggestion.   
  
"How long do you think she'll be out though? And you know that she always locks the door." Answered Harry.  
  
"I know that she'll be out for a long time. They're going to a coffee house. You know how she's addicted to that stuff. As for the key, I know where she keeps a spare." Said Ron confidently.  
  
"All right smart man. Where?" Retorted Harry.  
  
"Under her door mat there is a lose floor board. Comes up real easy. She keeps the spare key in a cigar box there. Said Ron quietly, " So how about it, you in?"  
  
"Fine." Agreed Harry reluctantly.  
* * * * *  
"Did you see her yet?" Asked Harry. Both the boys were sitting in the dorm's sitting room. All of the dorms here at the college were very much the same as the dorms at Hogwarts. The only difference was that there were more rooms and the doors to those rooms had locks on them. While Harry and Ron were sitting there, they were on the lookout for Hermione.  
  
"No, not yet..." said Ron, "Wait! There she is!"  
  
"Well what is she doing?" asked Harry impatiently. His back was turned to the girls' side of the dorm.  
  
"She's walking towards the exit door with her study group... she's gone!" relayed Ron.  
  
"Ok. Now, since this was your idea, how do we get up there without any one noticing, or us getting caught by one of the prefects?" Asked Harry.  
  
"Relax, I have a note." Said Ron slyly (Possession of a note could get you anywhere, if the person who gave it to you signed it).   
  
"So how did you get her to sign it?" Asked Harry.   
  
"I didn't. Fred and George, masters of con, forged it for me." Answered a glowing Ron. Harry smiled wearily. As the boys walked towards the girls' side, the floor monitor stopped them at the stairwell. Her name was Gertrude, and she wasn't easy to get past.   
  
"Boys in girls dorm? I don't think so, I'm afraid that you'll have to-"  
  
"Wait, we have a note." Said Harry, getting into the hang of it.  
  
"Oh." Said Gertrude, "Let me see it then." Ron handed over the note while Harry crossed his fingers, hoping she would see no flaws. After a careful scrutiny of the note, Gertrude reluctantly allowed them to pass.  
  
"Remember, no mooning, kissing or any other actions of intimacy allowed. Save it for the hotel room." She lectured. Silently mimicking her, the boys passed on, up the stairs and to the right, and passed two rooms. Harry kept a look out while Ron pulled up the floorboard and retrieved the box with the key in it.  
  
"Alright, we have the key," said Ron, putting the board back. "Lets unlock this door and have at it!" As the door opened, they saw an impeccably neat room. No clothes on the floor, food on the beds, or invasions of ants. Harry and Ron knew exactly which bed was Hermione's, due to the fact that the reading book on the nightstand was an A.P. transfiguration book.  
  
"Typical of her not to leave anything for us to find." Grumbled Ron.  
  
"Well it's not like she was expecting us to come snoop through her room while she was away."   
  
"Right... Hey, what's that?" asked Ron. "That" turned out to be a large plastic bag without a label. As all curious people will do, they began to paw through the bag. They found hair defrizzinators, perfume, make-up, a robe, and...a thong?  
  
"Ughhhh!" exclaimed both boys. Unfortunately, their horror wasn't over.   
  
"What are you doing in my room? And put that down!" screeched Hermione. Gertrude was with her, a look of deep disapproval on her face.  
  
"We were uh... yeah... and then we saw... it was Ron's idea...-" stammered both boys, shocked to have been discovered.  
  
"I don't care whose idea it was, just get out of my room. We can talk about this in the sitting room." Harry and Ron both exchanged guilty looks as Hermione led them to the sitting room.  
  
"What do you have to say for yourselves?" asked Hermione in that you're-in big-trouble-and-you-know-I'm-going-to-kill-you-if-you-don't-own-up-to-it voice.  
  
"We're sorry?" tried Harry.  
  
"Me too." Said Ron.  
  
"You better bet you are. Snooping through my room? What were you thinking?"  
  
"We were thinking that you were acting weird and that we wanted to find out." said Harry. Hermione rolled her eyes.  
  
"Would you like to know?" she asked.  
  
"Umm," both the boys were a little unsure after finding the thong, "Sure."  
  
"Well Victor and I are still going out, " A snort escaped from Ron, but he was silenced from a glare from Hermione, "And he wanted me to go to meet his parents for summer break. So I was buying items to bring up there with us."  
  
"Yeah, but there's one thing I still don't get." Said Ron.  
  
"What's that?" asked Herlione.  
  
"What does the thong have to do with anything?" Hermione's cheeks flushed a deep scarlet.  
  
"None of your business." said Hermione.  



End file.
